The Full Mounty

26.10.11



I've been trying martial arts schools all around Toronto, and just recently I tried yet another one.
And, well, it was interesting.
On the plus side, I was mounted within the first 4 minutes.
On the down side, I was mounted within the first 4 minutes.
Well, ok not really.  I did the mounting *tee hee*

You see, I tried Brazilian Ju Jitsu this time, which is similar to wrestling in several aspects for those of you who aren't familiar.  Similar in the sense that it all happens on a mat with holds, pins and submissions.  I get there and it's essentially a one on one class with one of the instructors.  He introduces himself, tells me quickly what the class will consist of and then plunks himself down on his back and tells me to straddle him.

Thank God I didn't laugh.
Almost.  But not quite.

So I step over him and then he says to come down onto my knees.  And when I am, well, mounting, he tells me to sink my weight down on him.

So I do.  And the belt that holds his Gi *uniform* is pushed up to my nether regions.

Seriously, buy me dinner and wine first.

Then he shows me how to escape a mount. The first thing you do is thrust upward with the hips.  So that's what he did.  With me sitting on top of him.
So now he's thrusting. Twice.  Apparently you have to do it twice. 

And as he does so he rolls over and I end up on my back with my legs wrapped around him.  Yeah.

But that's not the end.

Then he says to lift my legs higher and cross my ankles behind him.  And he says this is the front guard, or rear guard, I really wasn't listening by this point.  All I know is that's not what I call that position.

Then we did that several times.  Until he said, "Ok, switch.  Now I'll mount you."

How I kept my composure throughout, I have no idea.  But I did.  Until I broke down into hysterical giggles with my friend over coffee later.

Honestly, it was a great school with excellent teachers.  They were very warm and inviting and very professional.  I especially like the cross between a rough and tumble gym atmosphere with a highly courteous and professional attitude.  But still....the full mount is something to think about.


P.S.  there's still time to enter my Ruche giveaway

1 thoughts:

  1. I'm sorry to have to be the one to say this but:

    AHAHAHAHAHA!

    You have just made the day that kicked me in the balls so much better!

    ReplyDelete

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